A 90 year old friend moved today- from an independent apartment to an assisted living facility.
It was a good thing and it is a nice place, but it is also sad.
At first, she was angry and defiant. (Hope I'll be that feisty at 90.) Eventually, she agreed. She knows that she's increasingly more tired and frail. She's experienced repeated times of falling and being unable to get up; and yes, her memory is not as good.
I stayed with her all day. First at her apartment, while her family packed and moved her things.
Then I took her to her new home. It looked like hers. Her recliner was in place; bed made; etc. New neighbors were dropping in to welcome her. I stayed for supper and met her table mate. I kissed her good-bye with a prayer of blessing for her remaining time on this earth.
I am a nurse and should be used to this, but I have mixed feelings. I am 25+ years younger, but I am slowing down. The aches and pains and decreased energy affect my life now. My grandchildren wear me out faster.
It's not a bad time of life; just different. I have the blessing of time... in my younger years, I used it up too fast. I pace myself better. I enjoy things more.
Yet the questions rambled through my mind as I watched my dear friend. Will my health remain? Will I need assisted living arrangements someday? Will I make the transitions of life gracefully? Can my mind stay sharp and clear? What will happen to me?
I don't know the answers any more than you do. I just hope that I have a friend beside me when it's my turn.
Shalom, Connie
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The deepest heartaches can become heartstrings to God's joy, peace, and love.
1 comment:
Wow Connie, what a story! A reality facing us all, if we make it that far. My husband and I just had to help his parents move into assisted living last fall... they are well into their 80's. His mother was defiant as well, but once she got settled in and back to her old routine of taking care of her husband, she was fine. Probably enjoying the lessened workload I'm sure. My parents are still in their home, and I'm sure I'll be helping them too soon. I would say some handle the change better than others, but it is a necessary alternative to a culture that is too busy to take care of their own. It used to be different, didn't it?
Good writing Connie, blessings, kelly
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